Another week down

I'm 31 weeks as of yesterday! It's hard to imagine where we were nearly 4 weeks ago. The uncertainty of going in to preterm labor, the confusion, the pain, the joy, the shock. Oh, it's all still there; it's just 4 weeks later and preterm labor doesn't seem so scary anymore, nor does it seem a good possibility. We're surviving, taking it day by day.

A friend of a friend sent me this beautiful card with this quote:

"People bring us well-meant but miserable concsolations when they tell us what time will do to help our grief. We do not want to lose our grief, because our grief is bound up with our love."
- Phillip Brooks

WOW. That about sums it up! Grief and love can be so intertwined and it's confusing and exhausting. The fact that we are grieving for one life and rejoicing over another adds further confusion. But, I wouldn't have it any other way.

Oh how I long to hold my babies and tell them how much I love them! How I long to rejoice over Livia Joy and finally offer Amelie Marie back into the arms of Jesus. . . .
It still seems impossible to fully embrace these two moments in one day.

When you see a tragic circumstance from the outside looking in, it is hard to imagine how one could possibly face such a circumstance. When you're dealing with a tragic circumstance you feel the same, but you wake up every day knowing God has carried you through another day and you can't help but drive yourself further into the arms of Jesus, because it is there that we find such hope.